Going through tough personal problems...

coppercoins · Site Admin

Personal though it may be, I feel obligated to explain my virtually complete absence through the past few weeks here and via email.
A couple of weeks ago upon my return home from a speaking trip in Texas my wife of ten years came clean about a year-long affair she had been having with someone she had claimed to be her friend. Over this time I have been through a complete cycle of stress, moods, and emotions. Without a doubt I love her with all my heart and want to work things out with her to stay here with me and our son, but I am still not certain that will be the case.
If she decides to stay with me and work out the marriage, it will be a long, rocky road to recovery that will require more attention than I have given our marriage in the past. If she decides to leave, there will be a long, stressful divorce at hand. Either way, my attention will be at least somewhat diverted from the forum and site for some time to come. At times the difference will be unnoticeable, and at other times I could disappear completely for days at a time.
Please understand that aside from my family, this site carries top billing in priority for me. I want this site to flourish, grow, and exceed its potential -- but I want the same for my marriage, and that does come first.
I am by no means retiring or quitting -- I may need extended breaks here and there, though. Please bear with me, pray for the best outcome, and I'll be back as soon as I can.

coop · Expert Member

Chuck: I've been there myself once and it is a disturbing time. It is a time to write out thoughts in a file that no one else can read. There you can vent your frustrations, decisions, options, and it will help you work through and help clarify your thinking. I think this time is worse than loosing a Mate through death as you have to deal with memories that come to mind and be a happy one or a haunting one. With loosing a Mate to death, you only have good memories. So I always recommend the writting of a journal that no one else can read and keep it secured as you will want to vent all your angers there and help to come to a conclussion. It was my way of going throught this time. It was a nice fire when I had come to a decision and burned it. Today it can be locked away in a private file with a password, but mine came at a time before the computers.
So write, conclude and make decisions and remember all here are on your side. If you feel the need you can bend my ear (or eye) with knowledge of what I had been through. I will help out any way I can. Remember a journey starts with the first step, so take them slow till you gain your balance.
Understandably.... Coop

Robert · Senior Member

Sorry to hear that Chuck. I don't have any advice to give because I haven't been through what you're going through. I do hope things work out for the best and I'm sure you'll do the right thing, whatever that may be.

If there is anything I can do to help, let me know.

murphy · Senior Member

Hang in there Chuck. I've been where you're at. It's no fun - it's like a severe toothache, it won't get any better unless it's fixed or pulled. Hopefully your marriage can be mended.
Best wishes,

Steven · Expert Member

I've been where your at Chuck, I hope everything works out for you.

Steven

Bob P · Site Admin

I wish Chuck the strength to deal with this situation. As has happened to some of you, I too have been through this before, but nothing can compare to the hurt and confusion of your own situation. I will try my best to keep things running as smoothly as possible for the foreseeable future. My prayers go out to Chuck, and his family.

As Chuck mentioned on the coppercoins home page, I too have been going through an emotional roller coaster for the past couple of months. As many of you know, my Dad is not doing well. He had recovered from a minor heart attack, then partially recovered from a minor stroke, only to be stricken with a severe case of pneumonia. I have had to take several short trips to southern Florida to try and help my family deal with this.
On top of that, I have had to take on some extra work to try and stay afloat financially. For these reasons, Chuck has temporarily extended the suspension of the attribution services. If I am able to handle some attributions between now and then, I will contact folks directly. I have a pretty good idea of who has some work for me.

Please don't lose faith in the us. We are still adding dies occasionally including 8 new doubled dies for 2006. Keep this forum going strong as well. You folks make this site what it is. Chuck and I thank you for making us the best out there.

Earwig · Veteran Member

Good luck with these problems they take a strain and toll on your life. I went through this 12 yrs ago and can tell you its a very painful issue to deeal with. No matter what happens keep your chin up. I hope for the best for you

Eric

Doug · Advanced Member

Chuck, I'm sorry to hear of your situation but I can offer a meager note of consolation in this trying time.

In an effort not to preach I can only recommend the power of prayer and faith. We all endure trying times that take us to our knees figuratively and realistically. When things look most bleak and no one on this earth seems to be on your side Our Lord is there for "a talk/venting" if you only ask for help. You may not get a quick answer or resolution but, rest assured, that's the guy calling the shots with your best intentions and direction in life already decided.

Be strong my friend, reflect on what has occoured and what the Lord is teaching you thru trials albeit grim lately. Rest assured he's grinning on your future given faith in His direction.

wavysteps2003 · Expert Member

While in the Navy, I learned that the word submarine had a synonym, divorce. Yes, I did experience it and what made matters worse was that for the majority of my naval career, I was away from home over 7 months of the year and could not attend to things that were more important. However, that is part of military life. It was only at the end of being in the Navy that I became very lucky, and I mean very lucky; I found someone that I could spend the rest of my life with. This year will be our 26th married.

To say that I know what you are going through would be foolish on my part for each persons difficults are unique in their life. What I can say is that my hopes are that all will turn out the way you desire.

Robert (BJ) Neff

pdizbon · New Member

Good luck Chuck and God Bless !